Laugh corner

[Crested]

Well... I thought that people need to have one message topic where they can tell jokes and share funny pics etc. So when ever you feel blue, just come here and start cracking up.:jumpie: Deal? :bigok:

I'll start with telling you guys a little story of the first couple times that I met a dog.

This first one is according to my mom (we have pictures to proove it though, so trust me).

One of dad's friends had a black Labrador when I was about 1 year old. At that time she was still just a pup. I had never seen a dog before [i]on our back yard[/i] so I sat down on the lawn and started stearing at that dog (you know, you have to take a good look to see if that creature is my friend or enemy), the dog understood exacly what I was getting at and started stearing back at me. According to my mom the two of us sat there about 5 meters appart from each other, stearing at eachother for about 30 minutes. After that I took a ball and threw it at the dog. (have a picture of that) But she didn't seem to be too interested, but I guess that was the first time I fell in love with dogs.

Then this one I remember myself...

My neighbourgh used to have a big St. Bernard boy and I LOVED that dog. One day I asked the neighbough if I could take him out for a walk. He was a bit starteld by that, because the dog was bigger then me (I wasn't even in school then, so I must have been about 5-6 years old). With a little convinceing I got to take him on a walk (I didn't tell my parents though). We had gone about a half of the little walk we went on when we passed a house with a lady in about her 50's in her backyard. Her face went all white, her eyes got big(:o) and her jaw fell down (:eek3:) when she saw the two of us.
The two of us started talking and she wonderd what I was doing with such a big dog. I remember I anwserd that "he's a nice doggy". At the same time I guess the "nice doggy" got tired of beeing in one place so he got up on his back leggs and put his big front paws on my back. I nearly fell down on my stomache and took a quick look at the lady who's face started to look a bit blue at this time and started to shake (I guess she was cold) and I started to laugh. Little me giggled on the ground for a while and the lady was like frozen on her back yard. Then I told the doggy to get off (while giggeling) and he did that while wagging his tail at the same time. I got up and said bye to the lady (who was still too shocked to anwser) and took the dog home. When I got home I told my mom and dad what had happend and they made me promise to never take him out on a walk again. (Well you can imagine what would have happend if he had seen something somewhere and started running towards that something. Not much I could have done...)

So that's what happend... I had another funny encounter with a St. Bernard when I was about 1 year old, but I guess you're sleeping by now (I know I'm not the best storyteller) so I'll spare you.

I found a couple nice pictures again on the net, so I'll put them here so you'll have atleast something to laugh at... :oops:

Doesn't everyone LOVE sport?

[img]http://www.skrattnet.se/sport/bilder/eat_my_ball.jpg[/img]

[img]http://www.skrattnet.se/sport/bilder/bild_dufarsparken.jpg[/img]

[img]http://www.skrattnet.se/sport/bilder/bild_dufarsparken2.jpg[/img]

[img]http://www.skrattnet.se/sport/bilder/bild_dufarsparken3.jpg[/img]

I'm sure glad I'm not a male... :o

/Crest

[Crested]

I guess it's only fair that Microsoft get's some too...

[img]http://w1.470.telia.com/~u47021472/bilder/Gates/021.jpg[/img]

[img]http://w1.470.telia.com/~u47021472/bilder/Gates/017.gif[/img]

I guess it's not that much fun beeing one of the richest men in the world...
[img]http://w1.470.telia.com/~u47021472/bilder/Gates/004.jpg[/img]

[img]http://w1.470.telia.com/~u47021472/bilder/Gates/008.jpg[/img]

/Crest

[jen]

i think this place yu`ve created is great, we need a laugh :lol:
i love the pics from skrattnet , i`ve visited the site myself but can`t find the pics. It dosen`t help that i don`t speak that language :roll: , so i was wondering if you called tell me what to click on to see them :Help_2: , please!!

[Holz_Boomer]

hehe! too funny! :lol: :lol: there's a pic I have but i dunt know how to post it, it's of i little baby giving you the finger! :D

[Rowie-the-Pooh]

:lol: :lol: :lol:

[mouseatthebusstop]

:roflt: :roflt: :roflt:

[Rosebud]

:lol:

Here's another cute story about dogs and babies.


A friend of mine brought her little girl (age 4) to the lake, we were all sitting around talking while her daughter was petting my Italian Greyhound. We were not really paying a whole lot of attention to them when we noticed that they were french kissing, both of them had their tongues out and were licking each other, it was so cute we just had to laugh.


Another cute story:

My mom had a German Shepard and an Afghan Hound while she was keeping my cat Pumpkin (no pet clause at Apt). Pumpkin would run up to the AH swat him in the face and then run and hide under the GS. (Pumpkin grew up with the shepard). It was so funny, the AH couldn't do a thing about it.

:angel:

[ellieangel]

:roflt: :roflt: :multi: :roflt: :roflt:

[imported_Debbie]

When my brother Ken was a little boy we had a Boston Terrier named Boots, I don't know what exactly started it (probably my brother tormenting the dog :roll: ) but Boots bit my brothers ear, so my brother in turn bit hers !! :agrue: And they were both crying... :cry: I can say for sure that neither one bit each other again after that !! :lol:

[athenix]

This is great! I love reading/hearing amusing stories about one's childhood (or really, any point :) The fact that they really happened seems to make them even better.

Our first Christmas together, Adam and I stayed with my parents. While opening presents, Maggie was playing with Adam, and I went over and joined in, and for fun bit Maggie's leg (this is a game we liked to play, don't ask). Adam yells out "hey! you bit me!" and my parents were sitting there utterly confused, until he explained that Maggie had jerked her leg at the last minute (another part of the game) and I got him instead. My mother says "Nellie! I didn't know you were into that kind of *thing*!" ... silence ensued for about a full minute until I shoved a present at my dad.

[Crested]

I guess everyone has some ammusing stories to tell! MORE, MORE!!

Me... want... hear... more!!! :lol:

I really do!

jen: You go to [url]http://www.skrattnet.com[/url] and click on the link on the left sidebar saying "Roliga bilder" (=funny pictures). Then an annoying popup comes... close that one. On the page that you opend there are diffirent categories and under them links. Click on a link to open the picture.

Nya bilder (= new pictures)

Nya loggor (= new logos)

Optiska effekter (= Optic effects)

V

[marion]

Recovery Program for Internet Addicts:


1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my newspaper like I used to, before the Web.

2) I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing.

3) I will get dressed before noon.

4) I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web.

5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived.

6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web.

7) I will read a book... if I still remember how.

8) I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web.

9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email.

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not.

11) I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Web.

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime ... and the Web will always be there tomorrow!

[jen]

[color=red][size=7]THANKS CRESTED[/size][/color], that was really helpful. i will go and have fun checking it out :lol:

[jen]

[color=red][size=7]marion[/size][/color], i love your [color=blue][size=3][size=18]recovery plan for internet addicts[/size][/size][/color], :lol: :lol: i think i ought to give it a go myself :lol: :lol:

[mouseatthebusstop]

[size=7][color=blue]LOVE IT MARION[/color][/size]
:laola: :laola:

[Crested]

:lol: Marion, you didn't have to make an investigator spy on me! Everybody knows I'm a nerd and an internet addict! :lol: And I CAN stop, you know! There's no computer on the camp I'm going for a weekend or on our cottage so I have to be atleast... err... 7 days without a computer this summer... :oops:

Jen: Did you find any good pics?

There are several "The doctor wrote" things (wich are by the way real) that are incredibly funny. Stupid typos that doctors have made, but seriously funny! :lol:

I'll try and translate a couple here... You be the judge...

/Crest

[Crested]

[b]Theese are citations from real patientjournals. How people have survived theese journal repports is still a mystery...[/b]

1. Since the patient stopped smoking has his smell come back.
2. Searches because has hit his left big toe that is nearly completely fallen off. The personell can not pull it off because it hurts.
3. Has headache in his head.
4. Has been relatively good in the plaster.
5. Heard that the heart was good, but that she would return if she became unconsious.
6. The patient has a mandolin big prostata.
7. Theese were the patients that were lying on my desk.
8. The pain in the back comes back when the patient lies straight with both leggs on his back.
9. The patient goes with living support.
10. The patient is pregnant in her 19:th month.
11. Pain in left gearbox.
12. The patient had before had ears but theese have fallen off.
13. The patient things that his right big toe is hanging down a little compared to the other fingers.
14. Bleeds sometimes from left nose.
15. The feecies has the same colour as the doors on department 19.
16. Suffers of coursing.
17. Sometimes the patient feels better, sometimes worse. Sometimes she doesn't feel at all.
18. When she feels tired can her face be turned to the right and stay and pll a little for a while.
19. Before a drunk healthy man.
20. The throwing up disappeared at noone, as did the husband.

Author: Unknown.

[Crested]

[b]We are digging upp another 20 sick typos from the Sweedish medical archives. Theese are, if possible, even worse then the last ones...[/b]

1. A five year old girl with an earinfection twice a year since ages ago.
2. The patient must sleep high below the phillow.
3. Has been hillwalking. Came down with helicopter yesterday.
4. Medication: Doesn't know their names.
5. The patient got the advice to go and hang himself.
6. The patient has been judges as irrelevant.
7. A little lump on right side of left scull.
8. The patient smokes one cigarrett a week. Recomends to pull in on smoking.
9. A whole lot of troubles with her feet, can't sing for throat.
10. Uses a walkingstick and keeps on the roads.
11. Has allergic troubles. Conversation via te stomache that translates.
12. Year 1974 the patient got a digger over him. Since then had ringings in ears.
13. Has got bloody table spoonsin the deecies up to 15-20 times a day.
14. A chased man wih his head in left hand.
15. The patient has been in dog daycare in G

[Crested]

I'm sorry if the text seems hard to read... I made the translations really quicky... I'm a "bit" busy right now....

/Crest

[marion]

K: [size=6]No[/size] you don't have to do it.

As with all addictions, the person has got to admit they've got a problem.
Well, I don't think anyone here has a problem, [size=6]DO YOU![/size] :oops:

Crested: I have my [size=6]spies [/size][size=6]everywhere[/size] :o

I've also just had a week in a cottage without a computer, I survived, JUST! :cry:

[Daisysmom]

Great idea Crest, we have had a lot of heartache here lately, and it was a wonderful idea to post this and make everyone laugh :lol: [size=7][color=blue]You're the best :lol: [/color][/size]

[Crested]

Marion: Err... Ok... :o It would be fun to know what your spies have found out about me... 8)

Daisysmom: I'm glad that I could cheer you up! I don't think "I'm the best" but I guess I just like to make people laugh... :D It's nice to be appreciated though... :) So thank YOU! :angel:

Well to cheer you up even more here's another story. I found out the PERFECT toy for a Chinese Crested like Ben. You will never believe that. You know a milk bottle you feed babies with... They have this plastic cup on top to keep the milk from spilling in your bag or where ever you keep it. I gave one of theese cups to Ben and he LOVED it. Recently it broke (I stepped on that stupid thing... :x) and Ben had to do without a cup. Today my mom found another old cup and gave it to Ben. Now he's walking around with it in his mouth not letting ANYONE touch it. He know it's his.

Story number 2:

Another thing Ben thinks is fun is when I have eaten a cup of yogurt and give the cup to him after I have emptied it. Well... You know the yogurt gets stuck in the "walls" of that cup no matter what you do, so Ben thinks it's fun to lick it. No problem there, exept that the little cup is so light that it tends to move around when he tries to lick it. He was puzzled with the cup for about 5 minutes wondering what he should do to get the yogurt out. Then he had an idea. (You'll like this one.) He took the cup in his mouth, ran through the house with it so the carpets went into a little "ball" in the middle of the floor. Then he buried the cup in the carpet so the carpet was like a "cup holder" or something and just licked it clean! He thought the cup was so much fun so he had to run around with it in his mouth for a while too just for the fun of it. I took some pictures, I can post them here if you want to...

/Crest

[Rosebud]

8)

[quote]Marion I don't like it ...I don't have to do it do I [/quote]

[color=orange][b]K, maybe this is more to your liking![/b][/color]


[color=blue]Support Group By-laws for Internet Addicts:


1) I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read the internet version of my newspaper.

2) I will have my breakfast/lunch/dinner feed to me through an IV 24/7.

3) I will get dressed during time-consuming downloads; will have to pick which outfit I want to where for the rest of my life, since broadband comes today.

4) I will contact the maid service and make sure I can EFT them monthly for their service.

5) I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived with my word document.

6) I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web with my new program that allows me to internet surf and receive/make calls at the same time.

7) I will read a book... if I still remember how on E-books.

8) I will sell the T.V. and buy more computers so that those around me can IM me about their needs

9) I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email, I won't have to the T.V. was sold.

10) I will try and get out of the house at least once a week now that I can get the internet on my cell phone.

11) I will remember that my accountant can balance my checkbook while I am on the Web.

12) Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime ... and the Web will always be there tomorrow! only because they have not come out with an uplink brain implant chip yet.[/color]


:angel:

[ellieangel]

Oh Rosebud that could have been written for me !! :lol:
Except I don't have broadband yet and sometimes it cuts me off and I lose my 'new posts' before I have finished reading it :puppydogeyes:

[jen]

crested said...
[quote]Jen: Did you find any good pics? [/quote]

thanks for giving me the instructions of how to find my away around the skrattnet site, i did find some funny pics, but the best was a revlon add featuring michael jackson.....it was soooo funny :lol: , have you seen it?

by the way thanks for setting up this post as i`ve been feeling a bit down and miserable today, so i needed a good laugh [color=red][size=6]thanks crested [/size][/color]