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let's talk turds


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lemme set the scene . . .

5am barely light outside. i have been awake a grand total of 30 minutes. in that time i have tinkled, fed & med the dogs, and am now trying to potty the dogs. aspen having peed is now content to be ripping the grass out of the ground by the roots as if he were a cow. gaia (on leash) has found that spot, you know that one sacred square foot, in an entire acre, she has deemed holy enuff to christen with her stink. 2 bombs away and all is well until, dum dum dum, the dreaded dingleberry. the culprit? a momma hair! ugh! we share everything!

how funny the different approaches dogs take to rid themselves of the poo pendulum. aspen freezes like a deer in headlights and gives me a pitiful look as if to say 'yo human a little help in keeping my dignity please.' since i usually carry plastic bags in every pocket i am able to calmly walk up and grab said turd. this is truly a representation of his laid back nature. gaia is not so laid back she is more a like me a brute force kinda girl. she tries to outrun the attached doody ball!

remember i am attached to the other end of the leash. annnnddd the race is on! 90 pounds of rottie running full bore in an effort to escape the excrement. mom draggin behind trying not to be the victim of shrapnel. meanwhile i do get the occasional break when she slows long enough to look back and see the turd still attached. with each break in velocity i try aimlessly to grab with a bag and then we're off again. since my hair is so long i have given her ample length and when she runs the poop spins in a propeller type fashion. by the grace of doG i am able to slow her enough to carefully capture the culprit. i admit it -- today a turd got the best of me. tomorrow - REMATCH!

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[quote]how funny the different approaches dogs take to rid themselves of the poo pendulum. aspen freezes like a deer in headlights and gives me a pitiful look as if to say 'yo human a little help in keeping my dignity please.' since i usually carry plastic bags in every pocket i am able to calmly walk up and grab said turd. this is truly a representation of his laid back nature. gaia is not so laid back she is more a like me a brute force kinda girl. she tries to outrun the attached doody ball!

[/quote]


:lol: :lol: :lol:

oh that was just too funny.

nassa does something different again, when nass has a poo pendulum she gives me a sheepish look then she tries to remove it buy swipng her butt on the grass, if this doesn't work she kind of shakes her head and forgets about it :o then she tries to come inside with it still there...and...dangling eek!



felicia

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[img]http://groups.msn.com/_Secure/0WgDtAicd4Vom38xsxaLYcCHMWhUoh27mNDoJ00r6O2zNm!MSSgJaMul3vpYWZfH1MRPsS!Vti*pGN7AT!q7oneqJiiZU9MbFSJkjRLe4KxxigROyYYSzgYhlGjET7hop8w1wrgwaPLo/hahaha.gif?dc=4675441322206333973[/img]
[img]http://groups.msn.com/_Secure/0XgCJAj4eWcAmJrhh6PUbtN5WEdKm4k3tWeJNu4eWhUVJ8vJ0cBLtCLPs1trF30B8jAWtY1E2Y1yoYZTkHdwqKTCFe5p7dX1IMFBMQdm4UwSku16e2N2yF4YkXIO1loGqW8Kg19WdGFQ/cat%20rofl.gif?dc=4675441794237481597[/img]

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Yay!!! Turds, my favorite subject!

China hardley ever gets a 'hanger', but if she does ahe simply grunts and pushes and strains till it comes out. She likes her personal space a bit too much for me to get close enough to pull it out while she's going.

Now Zoey is a lifetime subscriber to the physics of centrifical force. Due to her indescriminate diet she will occaisionally get a hanger, and when she does it's time to get out of the way quick. She starts bucking and spinning in circles hoping to fling the sucker out, and when that doesn't work she sits back on her hips and start spinning in place. After that she'll stand back up, give one last push and it's free. Oh yeah, sometimes she'll pick one out with her teeth, ew!

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Wow rotten, that was so well worded, seems like you thought that out well. Must happen pretty often for you to type so well about it. :lol: I'm laughing my butt off at you by the way.

Toby will not go if I am watching, so even though I'm sure he has this happen on occassion I've not seen it since he was little. I also had my hair cut very short on thursday so it wouldn't work as a hanger anymore. When he was tiny though and my hair was half way down my back I would laugh my butt off as he drug the poo dangling from his rear around the room. I mopped alot!!!

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[quote name='Canis erectus']Yay!!! Turds, my favorite subject!

Now Zoey is a lifetime subscriber to the physics of centrifical force. She starts bucking and spinning in circles hoping to fling the sucker out, and when that doesn't work she sits back on her hips and start spinning in place. After that she'll stand back up, give one last push and it's free. Oh yeah, sometimes she'll pick one out with her teeth, ew![/quote]

My Gretchen (Lab/Rott) does all that EXCEPT the teeth picking part......... :lol: It's funny to see a 95lb dog doing all those gyrations !!! :o

Maisy my brown/white JRT has turd like a Carvel thinny thin machine......sometimes she doesn't completely finish and I have to wipe her arse when we come in......(I keep a container of baby wipes on the back porch for such incidents..... :P )

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Nothings more fun then taking your dog out and having him do his buisness, taking him back inside and 5 mins later find a "runaway" poop under your kitchen table. Yum! Nothin' says dinner like crap under the table! :lol:

Alan something about the way you worded your post and my mind thinking of Powdered donut poo in a box just made me laugh. Ahhh but anyways I think that the poo turning white is because of the minerals or vitamins that the dog has in its body...but I could be wrong...and I usually am.

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[quote name='Alan']There is only one thing in life that has ever puzzled me. Have you ever noticed that sometimes dog turds turn white and look like powderd doughnuts. I havent seen any of these white tirds for a long time but I always wonderd what made them that way?[/quote]

Eating raw food does this. My dog's poop is white & powdery, within a couple of days it disinegrates & is gone. No more poop clean up!! SO if you really want to see turds that look like white powdered donuts come on over!! Bring beer. :drinking: We'll sit in the back yard & drink cold ones & wait for the dogs to poop.

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I have an interesting poop story.
One day I am walking Dex, and he poops. I see him start flailing around so I figure he's got a dingle-berry hanging on for dear life. No big deal, it happens sometimes, he likes to eat tennis ball fuzz. :lol:
So, I have a plastic bag in my hand, and I figured I would just grap the dingleberry with the bag. I wasnt paying much attention to his arse, for whatever reason. I go to grab the hanging turd, which appeared very large, and PROCEED TO PULL AROUND 2 FEET OF AN EATEN LEASH FROM HIS ASS!!!!!!!
When I initally grabbed what I thought was a turd, I pulled and it just kept coming. I was absolutely mortified. Almost 2 weeks earlier, I had taken Dex to the vet for an ear infection. After the visit, I put him back in the car b4 I paid, as I dont want him harrasing sick/hurt dogs in the waiting room.
After we got home, I was looking for his leash in the car. Couldnt find it, so I called the vet and asked them if I left it there. They said no, I just figured it fell out of the car when Christine and I were getting in. He also ended up puking the other 2 feet of leash half an hour after the pooping of the leash incident.
Can you imagine if someone had a camera??? It would have made a hilarious pic, me "walking" him from the other end. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Seriously though, I am so glad he has a stomach of steel. I dont imagine many dogs would be ok after eating a 4 foot leash and having it sit in their tummy for 11 days.

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[quote name='Mei-Mei']Holy Crap Jeff!!! :o :o

I have a morbid imagination....did the leash have a silver fastener on the end, or was it one of the all cloth ones? What color was it (before it went in...ewww)? :o[/quote]
LOL! The leash was originally black and nylon. He pooped the handle end out, and I wouldnt say it was black anymore, more of a yellowish poopy color.
He threw up the end with the metal fastener. :roll:

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[quote name='Alan']Eww, I am gald everything came out ok, literaly. My dog ate his harness once. p*** me off because it was an expensive one and he had it on when he ate it. He didnt swallow all of it so I pieced it back together to make suer it was all there. The things we have to deal with![/quote]
Well we certainly arent the only ones. I have known a few other pits that have eaten leashes, harnesses, etc. It must be those HUGE, KILLER LOCKING jaws of theirs. :roll:
:lol: :lol: :lol:

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[quote name='Alan']Ya, I think your right LOL! Do you guys realize, one of the most popular threads of the day is about turds! LMAO. Well, I have to go to work. You guys keep the turd thread goin and I'll catch up latter lol. Have you ever seen that list of commandments like "Never trust a Pit Bull not to fight" Maybe we should add, "Never trust a Pit Bull not to eat a leash or harness"

BTW, at any point durring that leash incident, did you wonder if it was one of those huge tape worms. Did you ever see that special on Animal Planet about Parasites? There was a guy who got a tapeworm from some uncooked fish. I forget how many feet long it was but he was pulling it out of his butt and he called his wife. She came in and cut it off with sisors and the rest of it snapped back up inside him. It was nasty![b] I wonder how many wives would do that[/b] LOL?[/quote]

NOT this one!! :lol:

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I have some odd dog turd stroies... A couple years ago Zoey had decided to ingest the contents of a good-sized tube of titanium white oil paint. As I'm sure you're already guesiing, the next day's turds were pure white paint. Hannah was so mad that Zoey ate her paint, and I told her not to be that upset- she probably could have just re-used it once it came out. :roll:

Earlier this winter I came across a turd in the yard that had eyes! Not sure which dog it was but someone had obviously eaten a plush toy. Some black fabric came out the other end and so did some big googley plush eyeballs, and they were set in the turd just so perfectly. Come to think of it I never had figured out exactlt what toy that was or where it came from. Anyway, I wanted to get a picture of the 'anthropomorphic turd' to show my co-workers but the weather turned on me and it decided to snow storm before I had the chance to get film for the camera. :-?

I think one of the funniest things I've seen come out of a dog's rear would have been a little Winnie the Poo doll. It was from a client's dog that we were keeping at the clinic to see if Poo Bear would pass. I was there when it did and I kept getting images of Winnie the Poo stuck in the honey pot. :D

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