For Dog People

[Ickle]

Sent from the Internet (Details)



[b]In honour of our friend, the dog - from a doggie friend on another list.

Dear God - from a dog

This is pretty cute for those of us who are DOG people! Or who are not, for
that matter.

Dear God,
Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?

Dear God,
When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it the same old
story?

Dear God,
Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the
colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often
do you see a cougar riding around? We dogs love a nice ride! Would it be so
hard to rename the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler Beagle'?

Dear God,
If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he
still a bad dog?

Dear God,
We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles,
horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and
Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God,
When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to shake hands to get in?

Dear God,
Are there letter carriers in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

Dear God,
Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a
good dog . .

1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it
up.
2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like
the way they smell.
3. I will not munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box; although they
are tasty, they are not food.
4. The nappy pail is not a cookie jar.
5. The sofa is not a face towel; neither are Mom and Dad's laps.
6. The refuse collector is not stealing our stuff.
7. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.
8. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's
license and registration.
9. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
10. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is not an acceptable way of
saying 'hello.'
11. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the
coffee table.
12. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house.
13. I will not throw up in the car.
14. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt across the
carpet.
15. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch when
we have company.
16. The cat is not a squeaky toy; so when I play with him and he makes that
noise, it's usually not a good thing.
17. One last thing, God . . . when I get to Heaven, can I please have my
testicles back?[/b]
Ickle

[KathiNellie]

I just loved reading this. If our dogs could speak I know this is what they would say. Thanks for posting it :D

[izzy]

oh my... number 17 erase my smile

[ellieangel]

Very cute :)

[courtnek]

[quote]16. The cat is not a squeaky toy; so when I play with him and he makes that
noise, it's usually not a good thing.
[/quote]


ROFL!!!!

My cat has now "owned" 4 dogs....(he's 13 years old)...
Once an adult, the first time a dog made him "squeak" the dog's nose
got used as a claw sharpener....hasnt happened since. They all obey HIM...


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

[mouseatthebusstop]

:roflt: :roflt: :roflt: made me smile :lol:

[kendalyn]

[quote]Dear God,
We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles,
horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and
Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?
[/quote]

This one is my favorite :-) It's pretty true!

Thanks for the laugh :lol:

[StarFox]

Oh that was cute!

This one reminded me of something zebra did today.
[quote]Dear God,
Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?[/quote]

A rose was haning over the small wall that is in between our yard and the neighbors and zebra walked over to it, sat down and sniffed it for about 10 seconds. It was sooo cute! I wish I had a camera.