mandysfamily Posted July 29, 2005 Share Posted July 29, 2005 Hmm, hard to find a catchy subject line for this one. I need a little help. Some background: Our dog Mandy came to us as a stray. She showed up at the end of the drive lane of our rural acreage. I made lots of calls to the sheriff, local vets, neighbors and posted signs in local businesses. Safe to assume someone dumped this dog off because there was no one who knew anything about her. She was scared, skinny, wormy and full of fleas, had rashes and roughed up paws. We thought she was 3-4 months old (very soft fur loose skin) but found that she had permanent teeth. So regroup and assume 6 months at least? We are now assuming she is about 10 months old. She is very sweet and loving. She needs LOADS and LOADS of attention. One of my main concerns: She is very afraid of men. She does this passive aggresive thing where she will cower and whine, snort, bark, light growl, approach, jump back, run around furiously, just ripping the turf up, over and over again. We cannot get her to stop and listen to us during this, she becaomes afraid of my husband during this, almost as if she is just blind with fright whenever men are around. Normally she is perfectly fine around my husband and will occasionally approach my father-in-law, but if there are other men around or if my father-in-law wears a different cap or surprises her she freaks out again. I know there is a chance we cannot get this trained out of her, but how do we handle it? She will rip around running into people and objects when she gets like this, she is oblivious to our voices during this behaviour. I have other training Q's too but I know this post is very long. There are pictures of Mandy in the photo section. consensus there is she is a pit bull/border collie mix. We are former lab owners so you know are training sessions are limited :lol: I mean that in the nicest way, I just never saw any behaviour remotely approaching this from any of our labs!!! My biggest concern with them was "how to keep 80's perm going when dog pants on hair all day in pickup" and "how to reduce quantity and size of poop"! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucky Chaos Posted July 29, 2005 Share Posted July 29, 2005 What I would suggest is to turn any man she comes in contact with into a treat dispenser. Have them hold hot dogs, or a similar yummy treat, and everytime she gets near them have them hand her a piece. Tell them not to look at her, just hand her the treat silently. Every single time they get near her or she approches them, she gets a treat. She should learn that men arn't bad, and she gets rewarded. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mandysfamily Posted July 29, 2005 Author Share Posted July 29, 2005 Thanks for the reply! We have tried to some extent, my father-in-law often tries to hand her treats and she does sometimes take them if no one else is around (no men to distract her and/or no better offers) so I guess that shows he is getting somewhere, he petted her yesterday. Another friend tried over and over during a picnic that lasted about 2-3 hours. he tried even with mouth watering cheetos! She would skirt all around him, trying to get to him with out getting near him. She would lean in as far as her neck could go and try to reach the treat, she never did take from his hand but a couple of times he dropped the treat and she ran in and got it! We need to find a really patient friend who is willing to be rejected over and over and willing to spend lots of time doing it! Do you think this is a sign of aggression on her part? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imported_Kat Posted July 29, 2005 Share Posted July 29, 2005 I would honestly seek guidance from a professional behaviourist. I could give many suggestions but that would be careless of me as without professional interaction and competence, it could all go wrong. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mandysfamily Posted July 29, 2005 Author Share Posted July 29, 2005 I've never heard of a professional behaviorist in our area, but, if there are any in Southwest MN, log on, give me your #. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mandysfamily Posted August 1, 2005 Author Share Posted August 1, 2005 Hey, I think some progress was made today. My brother-in-law stopped by and right away I stuck a piece of ham in his hand and said please give her a treat! I had told the kids we could not sit and baby and console her when she gets all upset over men and we were having trouble just standing there keeping quiet so we went into the house and left them be. Well, I know he wants to help but he confessed that he kept trying to pet her as she came close to him. After about 10-15 minutes he just put it down for her. We came back outside and although she didn't ever take it from his hand, she [i]was[/i] acting normal. He was just talking to us not paying her any attention and she would walk all around the group through our legs, including his as if there were nothing to worry about. That is progress. I think part of the reason this is hard for us is we are a family of animal people who like to think we are "good with animals". I think it feels like rejection for these guys. I mean for my father-in-law and bro-in-law when our last dog died I wrote an obituary to send out and it mentioned them as her special friends. You could tell by looking at her that it was one of them turning down the drive. They are used to being idolised by our dogs. So now I am in need of two types of therapists :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mandysfamily Posted August 10, 2005 Author Share Posted August 10, 2005 Hi, training has been going very well. I think she has really advanced. Lately we have had some work done around our acreage so men were out several times to locate telephone and electric cable and survey and drop off equipment. She did bark a little and get nervous but we would say "no, Mandy" and she would soon settle down again and run around as if there were no problem. Then today a worker drove up and one of the kids ran out to let him into the house. We heard her bark twice and then nothing. My daughter said she didn't have to say no to Mandy. I really appreciate a warning bark anyway since we are a ways out in the country and I don't always realize someone is in the yard. As far as having men give her treats, ugh. Turns out no one can seem to give her a treat without trying to pet her!!! And she seems to not want to obligate herself to anyone (smart girl). So I ask if they want to lay a treat down so that she associates them with a treat. But, people seem to think they are going to be the one who breaks through I guess. The dog whisperer or something. Turning the Tables: Last weekend a friend was over with her 6 and 3 year old children. I had explained to her that Mandy's problem with men was really turning out to be more of a "Mommy" problem then a dog problem, and that our family's change in behaviour seemed to be the solution. She has been worried about her 3 year old not having a dog and getting scared of dogs so she was wanting him to get some puppy time at our house. Right away he didn't want to get out of the car, didn't want to get out of her arms, certainly did not want anything to do with the puppy! I babysat the kids for a while and once she left, he wants to go outside and then asks to play in our kids play house "and that doggie comes with me". He played with the dog the whole time he was here. Petting her, chatting to her. Then his mom came back and he was afraid to go outside :lol: I told her I think its like me essentially telling Mandy its OK to be afraid of men by babying her around them. She's skeptical but we'll see. I really appreciate the advice, it has made such a difference for us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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